This past Saturday Miranda and I joined our friends, the Gilmore's, at Acquire the Fire which is a Christian youth convention. This was a huge event with dynamic speakers and some really good Christian rock bands. One speaker struck a nerve with the kids with his talk titled "The Trouble with Parents". He shared about his own broken relationship with his dad who left his mom and brother and sister when he was only 2. He also talked about an abusive step father and how he struggled with the command to "Obey your Father and Mother". The speaker then talked about how important it is to forgive parents that have hurt you. At this point he invited kids who needed healing in their relationship with their parents to come down to the stage and he would pray with them. I kid you not, the auditorium came alive with kids making their way to the front. This event was held at the Palace of Auburn Hills, which is a huge place, so there had to be thousands of teens there. I couldn't believe how many kids had broken relationships with their parents. Honestly, just couldn't get over it. And these were the kids that were brave enough to come forward, so you know there were so many more hurting but not wanting to make the treak to the stage. As all these kids were walking to the front I leaned over to my friend Aleda and asked, "Are there really that many crappy parents in the world?"
I guess the biggest thing I took away from this event is that divorce just rips a kid apart. I knew that before, but I saw first hand all of the kids who were having a really hard time dealing with their parents divorce. I'm not getting on my high horse and preaching that divorce is never the answer. I get it that sometimes it is the best solution to bad situation. But this weekend I had a "A-hah" moment when I realized that the best thing I can do for my kids is to keep my marriage strong. One of the best ways I can love my kids is to love their dad. It only took 19 years of marriage to realize this. So I plan to have a lot more date nights with Brian this year. Lot's of dinners out, movies or just long walks to the park. And if the kids complain that they aren't allowed to go with us, I'll just smile and say "But Honey, we are going out on these dates for YOU". Think they will buy that? Yeah, probably not. That's OK-they we thank us later.
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